NRI Returns After 11 Years, Converts Every Price to Dollars Out Loud

VADODARA: A man visiting home for the first time in eleven years has spent the whole trip converting prices into dollars and announcing the result to people who did not ask.

Witnesses say it began at the airport, where he described a twenty-rupee chai as “like, twenty-four cents, that is crazy”. By the second day he was doing it for auto fares, haircuts and, in one case, his own cousin’s wedding gift.

“We were fine until the coconut water,” said his aunt. “He said ‘sixty cents’ and then looked at the vendor as if he expected applause.”

The family reports further symptoms:

1. Calling the weather “humid” as though it were news.
2. Asking for “less spicy” and then finishing everybody’s pickle.
3. Saying “back home” about a place that is not this home.

He leaves on Sunday with fourteen kilos of snacks and a firm belief that he “could totally move back”.